From an article posted by Kenney Myers
10 Ways to Avoid Holiday Weight Gain
Experts say portion control is key when the temptations are endless.
By Susan G. Rabin, MA
1. Never Arrive Hungry
New York psychologist Carol Goldberg, PhD, says planning ahead can help you maintain discipline in the face of temptation. "Don't go to a party when you're starving," she warns. Try to have a nutritious snack beforehand. If you do arrive hungry, drink some water to fill up before filling your plate.
2. Divert Your Attention
Many people forget that there's more to a holiday party than food, Goldberg tells WebMD. "Don't look at the party as just a food event," she says. "Enjoy your friends' company or dancing. Focus on something other than food."
Finn agrees. She says chatting is a great diversion, whether you're at a small family dinner or a large party. "Take your mind off of food and focus on the conversation.”
Another this is not to position your self at the food table.
3. Pace Yourself
Have you ever tried telling yourself you'll only eat during the first half hour of a party? Goldberg says this strategy is a mistake. "If you cram in as much as you can in half an hour, you chew faster. Chewing more slowly will fill you up with less food."
To munch at a leisurely pace, Finn recommends putting your fork down between every bite. "This puts you in control."
4. Count Your Canapés
When there are canapés, it's easy to lose count of how many you eat. Keep track by stashing a toothpick in your pocket for each one. Set a limit and stick to it.
5. Outsmart the Buffet
When dinner is served buffet-style, use the smallest plate available and don't stack your food; limit your helpings to a single story. "Go for the simplest foods on the buffet," Finn says. "Fresh fruits and vegetablesand shrimp cocktail are good choices. Watch out for sauces and dips."
6. Limit Alcohol
Avoid drinking too much alcohol at holiday parties. "It's not just about calories but about control," Finn explains. "If you drink a lot you, won't have as much control over what you eat."
If you feel out of place without a drink, Goldberg suggests sipping water or club soda, "so you have something to carry like everyone else."
7. Be Choosy About Sweets
When it comes to dessert, be very selective. "Limit your indulgences to small portions and only what is very sensual to you," Goldberg says. Her personal rule on sweets: "If it's going to have calories, it has to be chocolate."
What about sampling several desserts, if you only take a tiny bite of each one? "You have to know yourself," Goldberg says. "Some people can eat one bite of something and stop. I don't think most people can do that. "If you know you're the type who can't stop at one bite, you're better off taking a small portion of a single dessert than piling your plate with several treats you plan to "try."
8. Bring Your Own Treats
Whether you're going to a friend's party or an office potluck, consider bringing a low-calorie treat that you know you'll enjoy. Bringing your own dessert will make the more fattening alternatives less tempting.
And don't feel your dessert has to be typical holiday fare. "Get away from rigid thinking about what holiday food has to be," Goldberg says. "People love fruit."
9. Limit 'Tastes' While Cooking
If you do a lot of cooking during the holidays, crack down on all those "tastes." "People lose their appetites when they've been cooking because they've been eating the whole time," Finn tells WebMD. Instead of tasting mindlessly every few minutes, limit yourself to two small bites of each item pre- and post-seasoning. "Just put the spoon in and taste a little bit," Finn says. "It's not grounds for a big scoop."
For tried-and-true recipes, dare yourself not to taste the dish at all until it is served.
10. Walk It Off
Make a new holiday tradition: the family walk. Besides burning some extra calories, this will get everyone away from the food for awhile.
"Get people off the couch and move," Finn says. "Go out for a walk as a family before or after the meal." She says walking not only benefits you physically but also puts you in a mindset to be more careful about what you eat. "There's something about activity that puts you in control."
People often wait until January 1st to go on a diet or to get fit. Change that thinking and do something now. There is plenty of time to fit in 30 minutes of walking or better yet a small group exercise program. One of the top fitness choices is Kickboxing. The number of calories burned can be 800 per hour. Belonging to a small group program like kickboxing will motivate you and the support will keep you accountable so you see results! That can easily combat weight gain during the holiday season as well as reduce stress associated with the holidays. All of a sudden you can relax and enjoy a little over indulgement without the guilt.
If you've ever watched kids on a playground, you've seen the three elements of fitness in action when they:
run away from the kid who's "it" (endurance)
cross the monkey bars (strength)
bend down to tie their shoes (flexibility)
Parents should encourage their kids to do a variety of activities so that they can work on all three elements. Better yet they should enroll them in your martial arts school.
Endurance develops when kids regularly get aerobic activity. During aerobic exercise, the heart beats faster and a person breathes harder. When done regularly and for extended periods of time, aerobic activity strengthens the heart and improves the body's ability to deliver oxygen to all its cells.
Aerobic exercise can be fun for both adults and kids. Aerobic activities include:
Tae Kwon Do
Improving strength doesn't have to mean lifting weights. Instead, kids can do push-ups, stomach crunches, pull-ups, and other exercises to help tone and strengthen muscles. They also improve their strength when they climb, do a handstand, or wrestle. Kick and punch pads.
Stretching exercises help improve flexibility, allowing muscles and joints to bend and move easily through their full range of motion. Kids get chances every day to stretch when they reach for a toy, practice a split, or do a cartwheel.
Being overweight or obese in childhood has become a serious problem. Many things add to this epidemic, but a big part of it is that kids are becoming more sedentary. In other words, they're sitting around a lot more than they used to.
Kids and teens now spend hours every day in front of a screen (TVs, smartphones, tablets, and other devices) looking at a variety of media (TV shows, videos, movies, games). Too much screen time and not enough physical activity add to the problem of childhood obesity.
One of the best ways to get kids to be more active is to limit the amount of time spent in sedentary activities, especially watching TV or other screens. The American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) recommends parents:
Put limits on the time spent using media, which includes TV, social media, and video games. Media should not take the place of getting enough sleep and being active.
Limit screen time to 1 hour a day or less for children 2 to 5 years old.
Discourage any screen time, except video-chatting, for kids younger than 18 months.
Choose high-quality programming and watch it with your kids to help them understand what they're seeing.
Keep TVs, computers, and video games out of children's bedrooms and turn off screens during mealtimes.
They will need to replace that time away from the screen with something of equal or more fun. Get them into a structured program of Martial Arts. The classes will get them moving and have fun doing it. Not only will they be boring calories they will also be learning self defense, improve their self esteem, confidence and courage.
When kids are active, their bodies can do the things they want and need them to do. Why? Because regular exercise provides these benefits:
1. Strong muscles and bones
2. Weight control
3. Decreased risk of developing type 2 diabetes
4. Better sleep
5. A better outlook on life
Healthy, physically active kids also are more likely to be academically motivated, alert, and successful. And physical competence builds self-esteem at every age.
As a parent, it’s never easy to hear your child express negative thoughts or to see her wallow in feelings like self-doubt, sadness, or anger.
Unfortunately, science says it’s natural for people to dwell more on negative thoughts than on positive ones, and this can be even more true for children. This negativity is usually driven by fear, doubt, or shame, which produce stress chemicals in the brain. Ultimately, a negative attitude can shape how a child sees herself and the world around her.
But as parents, there’s plenty we can do to help our children develop a more positive attitude about themselves and their world.
Are Negative Thoughts Bad?
There are no “bad” emotions. All thoughts and feelings are valid. Both positive and negative thoughts and emotions play a valuable role in how we process the world around us.
For instance, sadness can help us process difficult times, and we would have no moral compass if we never felt shame or guilt.
Danish psychologist Svend Brinkmann explains that the pressure to think positively and be constantly cheerful has turned happiness into “a duty and a burden.” Additionally, trying to be happy all the time alienates us from our emotions, which simply isn’t healthy. In fact, recent psychological research indicates that emotional avoidance is one of the main causes of many psychological issues.
For these reasons, there's no need to pressure children to avoid or dismiss negative emotions.
What Can You Do Instead?
Instead, we can teach our kids to accept negative emotions and process them in a healthy way. We can encourage positive thinking and positive affirmations.
According to positive psychology researcher Barbara Fredrickson, positive thinking is important because it broadens your sense of possibility and opens your mind, allowing you to build new skills. Positive thinking, Fredrickson says, “broadens and builds.” It also makes children (and adults) more resilient.
Neurobiologist Richard Davidson of the University of Wisconsin explains that the brain is “plastic” and can be trained to be more emotionally resilient and to respond to certain emotions in a healthier manner.
This can be accomplished by engaging in mental exercises that help “rewire” the brain.
By practicing skills that foster positivity, people can learn to be more positive.
Here are seven activities you can practice with your child to encourage a more positive attitude.
1. Loving Kindness Meditation
Dr. Barbara Fredrickson found that just six weeks of training in a form of meditation focused on kindness and compassion resulted in increased positive emotions, social connectedness, and even improved health for participants in her study.
In a similar study, Dr. Richard Davidson found that as little as two weeks’ training in compassion and kindness meditation led to changes in brain circuitry linked to an increase in positive social behaviors, such as generosity.
Even three months after these experiments concluded, participants continued to display increased mindfulness, purpose in life, social support, and decreased illness symptoms.
Loving kindness meditation involves thinking of loved ones and sending them positive thoughts. Later, your child can expand her positive thoughts to more neutral people in her life as well. Dr. Fredrickson describes this form of meditation as “directing good-hearted wishes to others.”
The four traditional phrases are, “May you feel safe. May you feel happy. May you feel healthy. May you live with ease.” But the actual wording you and your child use isn’t important; it’s about generating feelings of kindness and warmth.
By practicing generating these feelings, the brain is conditioned to think more positively. It also shows your child how easy it is to engage in feelings of compassion and kindness, which can help her connect more easily with others and increase her overall well-being.
2. Helping Others
Helping others is obviously beneficial to other people, but it will also enhance your child’s own positive feelings and attitude.
People who volunteer have been found to have higher self-esteem and overall well-being than those who don’t.
Dr. Sonja Lyubomirsky, a professor at the University of California, Riverside, says, “People who engage in kind acts become happier over time.” When your child helps others, she will feel good about herself as a person, which will ultimately help her feel more optimistic and positive in general.
"People who engage in kind acts become happier over time."
Helping others is also linked to fostering a sense of belonging, inner peace, and gratitude. Your child could help others by assisting an elderly neighbor with yard work or chores, helping a friend with homework, or participating in a canned food or clothing drive. You could also make volunteering a family affair and regularly help out with a soup kitchen or other charitable organization.
A very young child can assist you around the house, help a younger sibling with picking up toys or getting dressed, or even accompany you (and be your “assistant”) when you help others.
The more your child helps others, the more positive she’ll become.
3. Recording Daily Awe Moments
Dr. Fredrickson explains that positive thinking can stem from recognizing and appreciating small moments of happiness and beauty. These simple moments can include laughter, a hug, a beautiful sunset, or the sound of birds singing.
One practical way to work on this skill with your child is to have her start an Awe Journal. You can keep one of your own as well, and you and your child can discuss them weekly or daily.
In the Awe Journal, you and your child will record sights or moments from your daily lives that you find beautiful or extraordinary: a rainbow, a kind act, or even the smell of freshly baked cookies. Your child can record these moments with drawings, descriptions, poems, etc.
It may seem small, but writing about positive experiences can actually have a major impact on positive thinking. A study published in the Journal of Research in Personality examined 90 undergraduate students who were split into two groups.
One group wrote about an intensely positive experience every day for only three days. The other group wrote about a control topic. Three months later, the first group was still experiencing better mood levels and fewer illnesses.
Working on the Awe Journal will also teach your child to begin recognizing and searching for beauty everywhere, which will help her form a more positive view of the world and herself.
4. Setting and Achieving Goals
Dr. Fredrickson and her colleagues also suggest that achieving goals helps people become more optimistic, positive thinkers with a greater sense of well-being.
Dr. Gabriele Oettingen, a Professor of Psychology at New York University and the University of Hamburg, explains that positive thinking alone doesn’t help people reach their goals. Sometimes, she says, “Dreamers are no doers.”
At times, people who are too optimistic about reaching their goals don’t take the possible setbacks they may encounter seriously, and they ultimately fail at achieving these goals, which may negatively impact their outlook.
To help your child achieve goals and develop more long-term positive thinking, try using Dr. Oettiengen’s WOOP strategy:
Wish - Help your child come up with a goal she would really like to accomplish.
Outcome - Engage your child in visualizing the best outcome that could result from accomplishing this goal. What would this outcome look like? What would it feel like?
Obstacle - Take wishing and visualizing a practical step further by generating a list of obstacles that could prevent your child from reaching the goal. These obstacles could include wanting to give up or getting distracted by something, like wanting to play with toys or check a cell phone.
Plan - Finally, make a plan for dealing with these obstacles if/when they occur. Have your child say or write sentences like: If/when [Obstacle], then I will [Plan to overcome the obstacle].
Visualizing and planning for obstacles in advance makes it more likely that your child will actually achieve her goals, resulting in increased confidence and a more positive attitude.
5. Sharing Positivity
One of the most powerful ways to teach your child to have a positive attitude is to MODEL this behavior for her. When you accept and process your emotions in a healthy way, you teach your child to do the same.
You can also share positive experiences with your child. Dr. Frederickson observes that “shared positivity—having two people caught up in the same emotion—may have an even greater impact on health than something positive experienced by oneself.”
She suggests such simple activities as watching a funny TV show or movie and laughing together, sharing a funny joke or good news, or being physically affectionate. Anything that sparks feelings of joy, contentment, and love contributes to positive thinking, especially when these emotions are shared.
Laugh with your child, hug your child, set aside time to provide your undivided attention, and enjoy positive experiences together. Taking time to discuss the Awe Journals mentioned above can be a valuable shared experience as well.
These moments of togetherness will deepen your bond with your child, and it will increase her positivity and health, both physical and emotional.
6. Developing Skills and Trying New Activities
Recognize your child’s strengths and give her opportunities to develop them and experience success. For example, if your child has a beautiful singing voice, let her try voice lessons and perform in voice recitals. If she’s an excellent soccer player, sign her up for a local team.
As your child develops skills and succeeds as a result, she’ll increase her confidence and develop a more positive outlook and attitude.
Similarly, trying NEW things can result in increased confidence and resilience. Encourage your child to try a new sport, instrument, game, or activity.
Likewise, if your child expresses interest in a new activity, let her try it out. As she enjoys or finds a degree of success with this new activity, she’ll develop a more positive view of herself, her abilities, and life in general.
You can even find new activities to try with your child in order to increase your shared positive experiences. Sign up for a cooking class, work on a few art projects, or take up rollerblading together.
7. Practicing Positive Affirmations
Positive affirmations are belief systems rooted in the universal truth. They are positive statements that children or adults can repeat to themselves in order to increase self-esteem, promote positive thinking, and change negative self-talk.
Affirmations are most effective if you let your child come up with her own. This is because the healing power of affirmation comes not from saying the positive words aloud, but from internalizing them. Your child will also take ownership of the process and be more committed to her affirmations.
Guide your child to come up with affirmations that are short, positive, and present tense. Examples include:
Instead of giving your child instructions or requiring her to say affirmations, try to use them in a playful manner. Research shows that children learn best through PLAY, so turn your child’s affirmations into a game the two of you play together. Take turns affirming one another and then saying your own affirmations, or come up with a song or dance.
You can also post your child’s affirmations on her mirror or around her room, or the two of you can make a creative art project using these statements.
The more your child says her affirmations, the more she’ll come to truly believe them, ultimately reducing negative self-talk and increasing positive thinking.
Maintaining a positive attitude is a difficult task for adults, and it’s even more challenging for children. But our brains can be trained to be more positive as we engage in positive activities, and you can promote positivity with your child.
Don’t pressure your child to get rid of negative thoughts altogether, but help her embrace positivity using the following activities:
As your child engages in these activities, she’ll train her brain to be more positive and respond to emotions in a healthier manner. She’ll boost her confidence, resilience, and overall happiness, and she’ll gain a more positive outlook on the world around her
Author Ashley Cullins, BigLifeJournal.com
Carmen answers questions for the PacerKidsAgainstBullying.org
Why do bullies pick on certain people?
– Davina, 5th grade
This is such an interesting question and one that unfortunately doesn’t have a perfect answer. We don’t always know why people bully or why they pick certain people to bully because bullying can happen to anyone. The best answer I can give you is to tell you the most common reasons why a person might be chosen as a bullying target. (While you’re reading this please know that even if someone has these risk factors, it doesn’t mean they will be bullied.)
A person might be more of a bullying target if they:
Are seen as physically different from others (overweight/underweight, wearing glasses or hearing aids, wearing the wrong” clothes, having a disability that makes them talk or walk differently)
Are seen as weak or not able to fight back
Are less popular and don’t have many friends
Are depressed, anxious, or have low self-esteem
Don’t get along well with others or are seen as annoying
Remember: no one deserves to be bullied, no matter what they look or act like. I hope that you will spread that message at your school and help make it a welcoming place for everybody!
We spend a lot of time talking about bullying as karate instructors. We feel it’s important that kids are emotionally, mentally, and physically prepared to handle anything that comes their way during some of the hardest years of their lives.
And if you’ve ever felt the effects of bullying, you’ll know how it can be humiliating and demeaning. Ninety percent of 4th through 8th graders report being victims of bullying, so although no one can be fully bully-proofed, there are things we can teach kids to cope with bullying situations.
Build Your Crew
Friends can sometimes act as a shield of sorts, giving your child the strength they might need to overcome sticky situations. As Brene Brown puts it, human connection is the whole reason of our human existence.
More important than friendships is the parent/child relationship. Maintain a positive relationship with you, so they feel comfortable in confiding in you, otherwise you may never know if they are being bullied. Your relationship with them can help model a positive relationship they can build with their friends.
As a parent, you can be the example of fostering good relationships with friends, relatives, people from church or some other groups, etc. Show them how to interact with others by introducing themselves, starting conversations, maintaining eye contact, joining activities, and showing interest.
Teach Your Child Emotional Intelligence
Emotional intelligence is understanding your own emotions. When children are comfortable with their emotions, they are more confident in relationships, with social status, success, and happiness. Emotionally intelligent children are also less likely to be shaken by the actions or words of a bully because they can understand emotions like anger, disappointment, fear, and sadness.
You can increase your child’s emotional intelligence by:
Teach Your Child Confidence
Oftentimes, bullies prey on victims who they see as isolated or easy to intimidate. When your child is confident in their abilities or even assertive, they can stand up for themselves without being aggressive or passive. They’ll be respectful, even when stating their feelings. Here are some ways you can teach your child to be more confident:
Bully-Proofing at East Mesa Karate
We want all kids to have the confidence to know what to do if they feel they’re being bullied. If you want to learn more about how we bully-proof kids, stop by our school, call us at 480-986-7177 or fill out our online form.
“Do what you love, and don’t stop until you get what you love. Work as hard as you can, imagine immensities…,” says Debbie Millman in a commencement speech.
At least, that’s one mindset. Since the 1960s, Carol Dweck, a Stanford researcher, studied perseverance and motivation. She found that children fall into two categories of mindsets:
Children with a fixed mindset believe you have as much knowledge as you’re born with. They think that if you have the ability, things come to you naturally. When failure inevitably happens, kids feel trapped. They start thinking they must not be as smart of talented as others have told them, so they start to avoid challenges to avoid looking unintelligent.
Children with a growth mindset believe intelligence can be gained through learning. They understand that even the smartest people must work hard. When they inevitably fail, they see it less as a failure and more as a setback. They believe they can improve through time and effort. They value learning over the appearance of being smart and will persevere through difficult tasks.
Kids learn these mindsets from what they’re told growing up.
Effort Versus Ability
One study shows that when fifth graders were randomly divided into two groups, what is said to them during an IQ test had a direct correlation with how they performed. They were praised in two ways:
During the test, she presented a choice of an easier and harder task. What’s interesting is that when kids were praised for their effort, they oftentimes chose the challenging task, knowing they could learn more — they were likely to feel motivated to learn and retained their confidence as the problems got harder.
On the opposite side, children that were praised for their intelligence requested the easier task, knowing there was a higher chance of success, and when the problems got harder, they were likely to inflate test scores when recounting them.
Change the Way You Praise
The brain is like a muscle — you can always improve the mindset. The more you use your brain, the stronger it gets. Practice praising in a way that will help kids have a growth mindset. Say things like, “Almost” and “Try again” instead of “Here, let me do that for you.”
East Mesa Karate and Growth Mindset
Our instructors are trained to praise children that will facilitate a growth mindset. We appreciate every child’s efforts when doing karate. If you would like to learn more about the way our instructors teach, come by our school, call us at 480-986-7177, or contact us through our online form.
“I QUIT” - said every 13-year-old ever.
The first year in the teenage sequence can be challenging because of school work and navigating friendships. This new environment comes with major social and emotional changes, even brain changes.
They Can’t Help It: It’s Their Brain
The prefrontal cortex is a section of the brain that weighs outcomes, forms judgments and controls impulses and emotions while communicating with the other sections of the brain through connections.
Scientists found that in teens, the prefrontal cortex, that vital center of control of the brain, is a little immature compared to adults, and it may not fully develop until your mid-20s. This area of the brain is used for risk assessment, safety, and ultimately decision making. Because the prefrontal cortex is somewhat shut off during the teenage years, it can help explain some stereotypical teenage behavior.
As kids become teenagers, their priorities change, including how they decide to spend their time. The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention states that young teens tend to “focus on themselves… going back and forth between high expectations and lack of confidence.” If their friends are walking away from sports, they may be more inclined to.
Reward Positive Behavior
Studies show that when teens receive a medium or large reward, they exhibit exaggerated positive responses to medium and large rewards compared to children and adults.
Greg Silva, President of Black Belt Schools International, says he’s experienced with this behavior, after teaching thousands of children. Seventy percent of kids quit organized sports at 13. Generally, retention for young teens in karate is a lot higher, and this may have to do with the fact that there are medium to large rewards in the form of belt rank advancements. Additionally, many schools, like East Mesa Karate, offer Jr. Instructor Training for young teens, giving them the opportunity for a great job at 16.
But this is where martial arts students have an advantage, Silva says, because they are built inside and out. On the outside they gain skills, self defense, speed, strength, flexibility and great coordination. Inside is the big advantage. Learning to set and achieve goals, build confidence, self-esteem, ability to block out distractions, perseverance, courage, sportsmanship and commitment.
East Mesa Karate Can Help Your Teen
If you have a teen or pre-teen, learn more about our martial arts philosophies. Visit our school or call us today at 480-986-7177 for more information.